Ten signs that the relationship between you and your advisor is souring

1. Your dreams (nightmares?) are about his/her disapproval.
2. That postdoc that's a stand-up gal offers to be your second.
3. You go to the bathroom in another building to avoid walking by his office.
4. Your lab mates begin carrying white flags and wearing T-shirts that say "NON-COMBATANT."
5. You get nervous every time you start your junker car, and not because you're worried it won't start.
6. George Mitchell drops by and offers to start negotiations for partition of the lab.
7. Brochures for the Merchant Marine and Alaska crab fishing companies begin appearing on your desk.
8. Your lab is referred to as "the DMZ."
9. Taste testers at group lunches.
10. During group meeting in the conference room, you notice there's a red button by her chair (ff to 1:57).

Chemjobber: like Cosmo, but with slightly less photoshopping!