Wednesday, March 23, 2011

New taglines for Scifinder




We all know that SciFinder's trademarked tagline is "Part of the process." I think that's kind of boring, so as a public service, I've offered 10 new taglines for SciFinder.
  1. SciFinder: Two weeks in the lab will save you two hours with me.
  2. SciFinder: Find the reaction you want? What am I -- Google?
  3. SciFinder: Destroying your original proposal ideas one hit at a time.
  4. SciFinder: Yes, the Egyptian Journal of Chemistry really does exist.
  5. (Web) SciFinder: Time to get a cup of coffee... in Colombia!
  6. SciFinder: Discovering the journals you don't have access to.
  7. SciFinder: Revealing the convoluted world of patents to you.
  8. SciFinder: You pay dues to us, remember? Or is it the other way around?
  9. SciFinder: Shenzhen ABC Chemical Company? Oh, yes, they'll sell you that.
  10. SciFinder: Sorry, your favorite paper you've published still hasn't been cited.
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19 comments:

  1. Unstable IsotopeMarch 23, 2011 at 8:49 AM

    SciFinder: That brick wall looks mighty tempting right now.

    ReplyDelete
  2. AnonymousMarch 23, 2011 at 9:09 AM

    Scifinder: $15k your company won't spend.

    ReplyDelete
  3. MattMarch 23, 2011 at 9:32 AM

    SciFinder: Because 4 licenses per site is really all you'll ever need

    ReplyDelete
  4. azmanamMarch 23, 2011 at 10:34 AM

    @Matt: 4 licenses per site! Try 1 license per 4 sites(schools)!

    SciFinder: Home of the 1-minute Time-out. (don't you skim that article on me, buddy! I'll log you out SO FAST...)

    ReplyDelete
  5. excimerMarch 23, 2011 at 10:35 AM

    SciFinder: making Elsevier look good for once (they make Reaxys)

    ReplyDelete
  6. excimerMarch 23, 2011 at 10:50 AM

    SciFinder: I hope you don't have to go to the bathroom.

    SciFinder: I really think you need to wade through 400 examples of one reaction from a Chinese patent to get to the reaction you wanted.

    Web SciFinder: How can we crash on you today?

    Web SciFinder: An unknown error has occurred.

    Web SciFinder: An unknown error has occurred.

    Web SciFinder: An unknown error has occurred.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Eka-siliconMarch 23, 2011 at 11:24 AM

    We suck as much as Windows- And we don't even care for all the same reasons! bwwaaaahaaaaa!

    ReplyDelete
  8. AnonymousMarch 23, 2011 at 2:10 PM

    SciFinder: Bizarro-Beilstein

    ReplyDelete
  9. AnonymousMarch 23, 2011 at 5:48 PM

    SciFinder: brought to you by the Beltway Chemical Society plutocrats

    ReplyDelete
  10. See Arr OhMarch 23, 2011 at 5:58 PM

    SciFinder: Say, we've delivered all these hits that are done on the surfaces of nanotubes / buckyballs. Wait, that's not what you wanted?

    SciFinder: I hope you know how to read Czech.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Polymer WristbandMarch 23, 2011 at 8:03 PM

    Scifinder: I hope you like looking up the credentials of all the authors you come across.

    Scifinder: I hope you like reading abstracts because I won't provide you with much else.

    ReplyDelete
  12. AnonymousMarch 24, 2011 at 12:07 AM

    Scifinder is a great database, I don't really know what you are all going on about.

    ReplyDelete
  13. See Arr OhMarch 24, 2011 at 7:50 AM

    Thanks, random CAS representative!

    ReplyDelete
  14. J-boneMarch 24, 2011 at 8:33 AM

    I agree with Anon 9:07, SciFinder's a very useful tool. It does have its quirks that can be annoying, but I can't imagine doing my Ph.D without it.

    ReplyDelete
  15. ChemjobberMarch 24, 2011 at 8:45 AM

    I actually agree. SciFinder is incredibly useful, and it has grown leaps and bounds since the first time I used it in 1998/99. I kid because I love.

    ReplyDelete
  16. AnonymousMarch 24, 2011 at 8:45 AM

    SciFinder...bringing you the ugliest drawings of organometallic complexes and sloppiest "multiple page images" at the "lowest" possible prices.

    ReplyDelete
  17. Unstable IsotopeMarch 24, 2011 at 10:17 AM

    I find it interesting that ACS and SciFinder responded to this post (on Twitter at least) but ACS hasn't responded to pleas from this site to do more about chemistry employment.

    ReplyDelete
  18. AnonymousMarch 24, 2011 at 2:52 PM

    You all obviously never had a chance to use Dialog.

    ReplyDelete
  19. NS 29March 24, 2011 at 4:20 PM

    SciFinder: Because grey matters

    ReplyDelete

looks like Blogger doesn't work with anonymous comments from Chrome browsers at the moment - works in Microsoft Edge, or from Chrome with a Blogger account - sorry! CJ 3/21/20

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