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| "Keep stirring, my friends." Photo credit: Wikipedia |
- At seminars he attends, the speakers ask him questions.
- The Office of Research Integrity borrowed his glare.
- He once grew a protein crystal the size of a fist.
- If he were to reject your paper, you would thank him.
- A drop of his tears can increase yields by 60%.
- If he shook your hand at a conference, you would put it on your CV.
- His personality is so magnetic, he's quenched 4 NMRs.
- On plagiarism: "No."
- Graduate students look forward to his oral exams.
- If he were to write you a procedure, you'd suddenly find yourself with 5 JACS papers... and an industry job.
- He's been known to tell jokes in Mandarin, and have Indian postdocs laugh at them.
- He can activate C-H bonds with a flick of his wrist.
- He once punched E.J. Corey. That's right, you heard me.
- His smile is so vibrant, nearby IRs need to be recalibrated.
- He taught a horse to review papers for him.
- His beard has been known to separate enantiomers.
"I do not do catalysis often, but when I do... I use Strem catalysts."*
*Parody, not intended as an actual endorsement of Strem catalysts (which are still awesome. Chemjobber would happily endorse Strem catalysts.)
ROFLMAO.
ReplyDeleteAny chance of an explanation for non-natives?
ReplyDelete@anon6:43
ReplyDeletehttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PVwG1t-NVAA
"When he sleeps, he doesn't dream of a snake biting its own tail, no....he dreams of the complete total synthesis of maitotoxin. Then he awakes and does it in an afternoon"
ReplyDelete"His touch warms any solvent to immediate reflux"
He can get product of 99.9% e.e. from racemic starting materials and catalysts.
ReplyDeleteHis gaze is hot enough to remove impurities instantly.
ReplyDeleteHe synthesized brevetoxin as an undergraduate - and poured it into the ocean, because it was beautiful and should be free.
ReplyDeleteWho's better? This guy or Dean Toste?
ReplyDeleteTo heck with pentavalent carbon. He once made a hexavalent carbon atom.
ReplyDelete@azmanam - And a dodecahedral iron complex, which he used to eliminate malaria AND male pattern baldness
ReplyDeleteWhen he dilutes homeopathic medicines, his water remembers the solute.
ReplyDeleteHe's so talented that only he could reproduce Bengu Sezen's experimental results.
ReplyDeleteOnly he can fully understand WuXi progress reports.
ReplyDeleteHe doesn't shed any tears...his Pi$$ may increase yields...
ReplyDeleteSince he's not a malignant narcissist, subordinates performing above his level aren't risking their advancement.
ReplyDeleteThe NSF and NIH apply to him for money.
ReplyDeletehe can separate enantiomers with his bare hands
ReplyDeleteI don't quite understand this. Can somebody explain it to me?
ReplyDelete