Friday, May 30, 2014
Professor Fails To Behead Student for Middling Yield on Protecting Group Reaction
THE CONFERENCE ROOM DOWN THE HALL -- Expressing shock, 22-year-old Kevin Jones was surprised to learn that upon what he thought was a poor performance at their second research group meeting, he failed to be beheaded by his adviser. "I mean, I reported that I got a 85% yield on that silyl group protection, which is terrible -- I totally expected that she would have my head." While Professor Brandstrom is known for her incisive questions and has a reputation for brooking no nonsense, she seemed to not notice her new graduate student's nervousness or his self-perception at being an absolute failure as a graduate student and an organic chemist. Also, she failed to pull out a sword and behead him on the spot, which was the third-hand story told of a recent postdoctoral fellow. "The 4th years told me she keeps the sword in the coat closet in her office -- maybe she doesn't wear it all the time", he mused to himself.