Let's be honest, folks -- sometimes, there's nothing more satisfying than telling a colleague or (better yet) a superior that they might be incorrect. Here are a few ways of passing along that, well, they're wrong:
1. "Hey, uh, did you check that with the literature?"
2. "Horsepucky!"
3. "Do you mind if I see that NMR?"
4. "Huh."
5. "Right!" [walks quickly away]
6. "That's an interesting interpretation -- do you mind walking me through your logic?"
7. "Really?" [arched eyebrow]
8. "The hell it is."
9. "Is there precedent for that?"
10. "%$%$%$$%!"
11. "Whatever you say, Bengu."
12. "You're so full of it, your eyes are turning brown."
13. "Perhaps you need to reinterpret your data."
14. [silence]
15. "I think you're wrong."
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15A: Dude, did you fart? What's with all the handwaving? (Had a prof who liked the term "handwaving arguments".)
ReplyDelete6A: "That's an interesting thing you've done there" - my advisor's response to a student, who when asked provide a relationship between the velocity of gas atoms and their energy, wrote on the whiteboard E=mc^2.
ReplyDelete16! "I'm...CONCERNED..." What a PI says to a student right before s*** gets REAL.
ReplyDeleteHA, my mom used to say 12 to me all the time, except it was said more along the lines of "Ole brown eyes..." in a smiling dismissive fashion.
ReplyDelete@scicurious
ReplyDeleteMAD REAL!!! Alright!
"You're probably correct within a few orders of magnitude."
ReplyDelete"What's that on the fan?"
ReplyDeleteMAD REAL!!! Alright!
ReplyDeleteA'IGHT!
I've always been a fan of "BOOOOOO!!!"
My advisor does the tactful "Well.... That could be one possible interpretation. However, I think if you look at it this way...".
ReplyDeleteShirley, you can't be serious!
ReplyDeleteWe always know our boss is about to disagree with anyone. He starts with "So". Except it is more like SOOOOooooooooo,....
ReplyDeletereminds me an uncharitable Russian asshole boss we had at my previous company. If you disagreed with his interpretation his trademark reply was:
ReplyDelete"Yes - but - it seems to me that you khave no data!"
Russians are great at telling you you're wrong. I knew one that would say....
ReplyDelete"I don't thiinnk so."
Personally, I'm a fan of the classic ghetto-fabulous dismissives:
ReplyDelete"Oh no you did-n't!"
"Aw...HELL no!"
There's always the hybrid of 7 & 14: roll your eyes in disgust.
"Hmmm...I'm probably wrong, but allow me to suggest something..."
ReplyDelete"Perhaps you'd care to suggest a mechanism to explain how *that* product might have been produced?"
ReplyDeleteWe had one guy come up to us at a meeting and yell "I do not think you are stupid, I merely think you are WRONG!"
ReplyDeleteWe simply say " Sir/Madam, the asylum is that way."
ReplyDelete