Friday, April 1, 2016

Announcing the World Chemical Congress of CV Padding

2016 World Chemical Congress of CV Padding
              December 9 to 12, 2016, Orlando, Florida, U.S.A.

Welcome to the sunshine of Orlando, Florida for the CJ WCCCVP 2016, a flagship international conference sponsored by the Chemjobber Institute of Chemical Employment Study promoting all aspects of CV padding (CVp). The CJ WCCCVP 2016 co-locates multiple exciting symposiums at one single location, providing a unique opportunity to encourage cross-fertilization and collaborations in all areas of CV padding. The CJ WCCCVP 2016 features a large number of keynotes, tutorials in padding your CV, and special sessions in all manner of CV padding. The CJ WCCCVP 2016 will also offer a number of travel grants as well as an exciting Predoctoral Consortium, a ABD Consortium, Doctoral Consortium, a Postdoctoral Consortium and a Postpostpostpostdoctoral Consortium.

In following with the the best traditions of CV padding: 

YOU are an invited plenary speaker. 
YOU are on the organizing committee. 
YOU are the chair of your own invited symposium. 
YOU are a keynote speaker. 

We hope you could participate in this exciting event, and look forward to joining you in padding CVs in Orlando in December 2016!

Important dates:

Paper submission: June 15, 2016
Notification to authors: September 5, 2016
Final submission: October 5, 2016
Early registration: October 5, 2016


  1. Happy Fools Day to you too!!!!!!!!

  2. CJ: An important announcement pertaining to the "book signing" event by Noble and Ignoble chemists are missing from your program. Please amend the agenda.

  3. Registration is only $900 per person. Accommodation and catering not included.
    We are also delighted to offer a new "fast track" conference abstract submission option. For an additional $200 your manuscript will receive "special peer review" to greatly improve its chances of acceptance into our program.

  4. @CJ

    OMG, I get almost 20 of this type of e-mail each day. Happy April Fool's :-D

  5. Isn't this the Zing conferences thing? Most of them are in Florida at around that time.

  6. It's going to be open bar, right?

    1. Of course! YOU are the sponsor of the open bar, yes?

  7. So, basically, we're all going to Disney?

  8. I'll begin preparing my keynote address NOW! Perhaps I'll talk about how my gen chem students can't operate a faucet, can't measure with a ruler, have trouble measuring pH with a pH meter, and have generally failed to meet my own and ACS national expectations. You know, in a universal sense. It will encourage all of you who simply have to convince students to MULTIPLY density by volume to get mass and not to DIVIDE.